Here we are in the midst of one of America's least celebrated holidays: TV Turn Off Week. It's safe to say that more people celebrate Arbor Day. It's also safe to say that few other holidays are likely to cause as much consternation in people as this week-long festival of non-televison watching, with the possible exceptions of Buy Nothing Day and Kwanzaa.

Ok, so TV Turn Off Week isn't officially a holiday, but it qualifies on enough levels to allow us to apply the term (it's an annually "celebrated" event, regardless of the low participation. Fortunately for many cults, high participation isn't really a requirement for holidays).

The reasons to spend a week away from one's television are clearly stated by its organizers, the TV-Turnoff Network; and the fact that the only other program they currently sponsor is the "More Reading, Less TV" campaign, makes their primary goal a pretty explicit statement. Surely, no one could argue with the benefits of being able to not only read, but to read well, so there's no point in writing an apologia for TV Turn Off Week. Also, its opponents feelings on the subject have been also stated (if not quite as clearly).

Who can genuinely say what's right? With something as ultimately silly as this whole thing is, I don't expect there to be some sort of terrible consequence, since neither side will ever be able to destroy the other. Sure, people may in fact become addicted to television, it may promote over-consumption, and be one of the prime factors in the growing waistline of America -- but the opposition is right too: People are incapable of changing their own character. Liars will always lie, thieves will always steal, and couch potatoes will always forego active lifestyles in favor of seeing what Dharma is up to this week.

No, the real puzzle is why some people are offended by the notion of taking a week off from television. It's remarkably like the defiance of an addict. What they seem to object to most strenuously is the idea that they can't help themselves, that they lack self-control. "I can stop if I want to," they almost seem to say, and to prove their point, they resolutely continue to watch television. "That'll show 'em!"

Perhaps it's nothing so grim, perhaps there's another reason. As a general rule, people who value freedom hate it when somebody tells them what to do. In this case, the reaction is merely that -- not thought out, not the result of a considered opinion, just a reflexive push back at someone perceived to be pushing them. Which is funny, when you consider that television is all about telling people what to do.

We not only follow instructions during emergency situations, a large number of us call certain 800 numbers when they're told to purchase something. Of course, there are much more subtle advertisements on the air, but if we hate being told what to do, then why do we spend so much time sitting still for it? Television exists for the sole purpose of delivering willing consumers to the folks who pay for it. Everything you see, even on modern-day public television, was created with the support of advertising dollars. Advertising is inescapable -- or is it? Actually, libraries are one of the few places where there is little visible advertising (assuming you're not there to use the Internet, read a newspaper, or a magazine). Books don't usually have ads in the middle. Even if they did, you could rip them right out -- who would complain? It costs you nothing to borrow books from a library, as long as you return them on time.

Of course, who has time to go to the library, and anyway, books are boring. Yes, and exercise is hard and time- consuming, and steamed vegetables are bland compared to french fries. Our biological make-up does not make it easy for us to turn away from instant gratification. And this, perhaps, is the root cause of the deep antipathy for TV Turn Off Week.

The environment that hardened our ancestors and made them the most successful predators on Earth has been tamed by our highly advanced labor saving devices. We're still on top (although viruses are gaining ground), even with all the time we spend attempting to satisfy our desires. Television is our last perfect invention: It can keep you company when you're lonely, it can satisfy your wander-lust, it can baby-sit your children, it can take up space that would otherwise require you to carry on unwanted conversations, it acts as a substitute for love, and sex, and violence; it can kill hours of time that would ordinarily be consumed by sitting around wondering what else there is to do. It stabilizes our mood. It's one of very few legal drugs that have no medical benefits and is consumed solely for pleasure.

From this perspective, TV is wonderful. But that's the one thing that you never hear the opponents of TV Turn Off Week say. We love television, even the parts of it that are truly awful, even the advertisements; it's not rational - - but emotion is television's stock in trade. It makes us feel things, it manipulates us like the world's greatest mental masseur. Until we find a way to deliver direct-current to the pleasure centers of our brains without killing ourselves, it's really the most fun you can have on a Thursday night.

Are we addicts, brainwashed proles, or merely animals responding to a perceived threat? Who knows. The important thing is that the question has been asked. Unless we can't stand the thought of learning something about ourselves. Perhaps we can't. Perhaps that's why we needed television in the first place. Thinking, as we all must have learned by now, is the leading cause of depression.

-B. C. Silvia